Relationship & Dating Insecurities

Every so often, I’ll reach the point of being insecure that I start to question my ways. I know most folks can understand this feeling because it is in our nature as individuals. The questioning of values, ideals, and paths compared to others and in the larger picture, society. Always with the comparing that leads to doubt, which creates fear. Fear leads to anger. Anger leads to hate. Hate leads to suffering.

When it comes to relationships and dating, I see it as a never-ending experience that is in constant flux and it is my responsibility to continue to improve on myself for myself and no one else. The day I stop learning and growing is the day things will take a turn for the worse and I shouldn’t be with anyone. A work in progress if you will.

Retiring the DREAMER Narrative and Identity

In the beginning, an individual would identify as a ‘DREAMER’ because they qualified for the legislative bill: Development, Relief and Education of Alien Minors aka The Dream Act. The bill was first introduced in 2001 and needless to say, both the bill and the movement it behind it have dramatically changed.

The other day, a reporter from the Associated Press gave me a call and asked me a few question in regards to a story they’re working on, why DREAMERS don’t want to identify as DREAMERS anymore. Ugh… this post is going to have the word DREAMERS everywhere, how 2009. Anyway, I gave him my two cents, which I’ll gladly share here in greater detail.

Redefining Aspects of my Life

Redefining numerous aspects of my life has been eye opening. I question myself in a healthy fashion that’ll spur conversations with friends about the spaces, identities and actions I claim. For me, now more than ever, these redefinitions and reflections come as another year passes by and old things become new again. Lather, rinse and repeat. Always repeat.

In many ways, it seems like I’m constantly looking back to avoid making mistakes I’ve already learned as I look into what has yet to be. All natural and universal human emotions and experiences really, nothing new.

For myself, I’ve pretty much kept the same habits, interest, personality etc. with the difference that now that I’m older, I’m clearly able to articulate my scandal, partly because I’ve been doing it for a while now, and because I am passionate about it. Not to mention that somewhere along this journey, I learned not to give a flying fuck about what others think of me, and sailing my own ship.