Monday, July 08, 2013

Stability

I had a four-day weekend thanks to the 4th of July holiday. No, I didn’t celebrate America’s birth, but I did take advantage of the free time that was given to me. I spent every single day drunk, waking up in the middle of the afternoon, and kicking it with the homies. Life is good to me right now.

Being dacamented sure is hard. NOT. Me having a good time has nothing to do with my immigration status, ever. More than anything, ever since I did receive my work permit, things have been easier in the sense of administrative changes. Paper work is no longer a huge round around, sure. And I no longer have to carry my passport when going to bars. Shit, DACA hasn’t changed my life.

But stability is something that has dramatically changed my life on levels a legal status in the US never could. Good lord baby Jeezus, 7 lbs 8 ounces, stability has eluded my grasp for as long as I can remember. Whether it was when I lived with my family or when I set out on my own, stability is a rare, almost mythical status that is the foundation in which everything else hinges on.

Fact, at one point in my life, lack of stability was the cause of endless heartache. An X dumped me because basically I didn’t live on my own, had no real future aspirations, didn’t drive etc. And that’s me paraphrasing it nicely. Anyway, I finally have it and I’m holding on to it for dear life. I am not going to let it go without fighting to keep it for as long as I can.

And like everything else in my life, the amazing people in my life made this new found stability possible. Through their support, I’ve been able to get to where I am today. They’ve always helped me out when I needed it the most, and for that I can never repay them enough.

While stability is something completely new to me, I know that I can’t get comfortable enough so as to become stagnant. While I know that I always have to continue moving forward, I love that I’m able to have room right now to take things easier, have fun and make the best of what I have. We all need and deserve that. Ain’t no way I’m working myself for the man just so I can get fucked over at the end of the day. Nah son.

It’ll be nice to be able to end this year with the way things are going. It’ll be the first time I’ll be able to catch my breath, and seriously look at what I want for myself in the coming years, instead of flying by the seat of my pants and always making do with what I got. I’m truly blessed to be where I am, shit wasn’t easy. So you best believe I’ll pay it forward so others can have their taste of stability.