Tuesday, July 06, 2010

A month of unemployment

Truly, in my 25 years of life on this earth, I have had the most fun this past month. Seriously. Even I can't believe how I've been able to manage this long and going to all the parties, events and adventures I've been on. Drinking all night long, dancing till six in the morning and spending time with friends. I love it, but it will have to come to end soon enough.

AS it is, I spend my time volunteering at a non-profit. Weekends I sleep in and go to parties, art galleries, poetry nights, concerts and stuff like that. I end up going with friends and drinking because they bring the stuff. That's basically it really. In-between all this I still do DREAM Act work by talking to classes and outreaching at events. I also ride my bike a lot since that's free. The pressure to get a job still isn't there yet. School start in two months and I'm feeling really apathic about where I'm going right now.

Part of me just wants to jump off the LA River and end it all. I wanna quit school and leave everything behind. I wanna have the life I have right now. Going to a place that I look forward going to and doing great work. Being able to hang out with friends not worrying about going home early because I have work. Granted that there has been a lot going on because it's summer and friends are leaving for trips, which means going away parties. Part of me wishes this was my life already. Curating art shows, organizing for DREAM Act and community issues, writing and living a decent, honest life. That's what depresses me the most. That I still have to pay more dues to have that kind life. One day I guess. One day.